Why Help

Three Students

There are times when just talking to your friend about the problem can provide needed relief. You can listen supportively without making judgments. You could offer advice, (especially if your friend asks you for it,) walk through difficult choices together, or suggest that more help may be needed. Whatever you decide to do, it’s ok to “be a friend” and help.

Your friend may ask you to not tell anybody about his/her problem. S/he may be ashamed of having the problem – or worried that there is no solution – and afraid of creating more problems if they disclose it. What is troubling them may inhibit taking healthy action. Sometimes you may feel like you shouldn’t intervene; "it’s none of your business," or you fear your friend might get angry. However, know that it is a sign of deep caring to offer a person help that may alleviate his or her suffering.

By the way, taking care of your friend may be hard on you! It’s ok for you to ask for help yourself, look for your own resources, rest, take space for yourself and set limits with your friend as needed. If you have nothing left to give, you won’t provide healthy support to your friend.